Nesting and researching

This week we turned a corner. On Sunday, Father’s Day, it was surprisingly clear to both of us at separate times (but in the same place) that we were ready to look at adopting a black or biracial baby.

Adoption is not a new thought for us – we both thought it’d be a part of our family even before we met – but we didn’t know when the timing would be right. Suddenly, the timing is right. And we are so excited! For me that means that I’ve been to the library to check out books on adoption, spent hours on the web researching agencies and issues, started talking to friends who are experienced in the different sides of adoption, and reading lots of adoptive family blogs. For Good Cop it means putting off his dream to start a saltwater fish tank, buying and painting the trim to finish the second bedroom so it’s ready for a home visit, and listening to me talk about all the things I’m learning about our adventure.

Right now my biggest concern is about being a good mommy to a baby of a different race. I know it will be difficult, and perhaps somewhere along the way to a placement I’ll discover that I’m not cut out for it. It really seems crazy sometimes that we’re even considering it. Our neighborhood is not exactly diverse. Our church of 1,000 people just accepted its second black member last month. The Bhutanese refugees who’ve settled here in the last five years have added a smattering of color to our city but it’s hardly a rainbow yet. Good Cop and I both had black friends when we were growing up but we all lost touch years ago.

Still, I can’t get it out of my head. And it was in Good Cop’s head before I said anything about it, so I think we need to follow this wherever it takes us.

Have I mentioned we’re excited? Right now, right here, everything seems to be falling into place to start our family. There is nothing better. Nothing.

I can not wait to get started.

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